


Lost

by trippingtozier



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M, I just KNOW I'm gonna find a way to add a breeding kink, I'm Hungry, Light Angst, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Reader-Insert, The First Order, Ugh whatever, also angry sex ;), but we all want him to fuck us anyway so, kylo ren is such a bitch, library sex i guess, perhaps some hurt/comfort, the knights of ren
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-12
Updated: 2020-06-06
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:29:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24139642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trippingtozier/pseuds/trippingtozier
Summary: You work for The First Order in a menial job, Kylo Ren uses you as a fuck toy, but we all know our boy just has extreme emotional issues, blah blah blah, somehow it's all gonna work out.The End:)
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Reader, Kylo Ren/You
Comments: 1
Kudos: 20





	1. Chapter 1

**“** I try to give in and lose every time

I'm lost insight of something new to me  **“**

**Lost : Emily Afton**

~~ {x} ~~

**DATAPAD MESSAGE INCOMING**

**SENDER** : Brinna Horne

**11:36:08 PM**

**U up?**

The datapad buzzes on your side table, pulsing like a heartbeat. Once, twice, three times. You don’t have to read the message to know it’s Brinna, but you’ll be unable to sleep unless all your notifications are cleared. 

The screen is bright, bathing your tiny pod in an unnatural light. 

It’s against regulation to be sending messages this late, but no one is around to stop you. You send back a simple,  _ yes _ . As if made to irritate you, another message from Brinna pops up almost immediately.

**Commander Ren had another temper tantrum.**

**Headed to your side of the ship.**

**Be careful.**

_ What happened? _

**I assume General Hux infuriated him again.**

**That’s usually the case, isn’t it?**

_ Yeah. _

**It’s like he’s making my job hard on purpose!**

**Everytime I get one thing fixed, he’s wrecking another.**

**You’re lucky.**

_ I am? _

**Commander Ren never goes down to the record room.**

_ He always sends a Knight. _

_ They scare me. _

**At least they know how to compose themselves.**

**Stars, I almost forgot to let you know!**

**Kesi is having some people over to his pod tomorrow.**

**You know, to brag about the upgrades.**

**Will you come with me?**

Kesi. You’ve heard Brinna complain about him in the past. Why would she bother being in his presence for longer than she has to?

_ Maybe. I’ll let you know,  _ you send. You turn your datapad off before you can see if she responds.

Your room is dark now. Cold, too, although you’re used to it by now. You’re used to the constant hum of the ship, the subtle vibrations coming from the floor when you pad across your pod barefoot. 

You have the luxury of a tiny window, not large enough to provide any light, but enough to see some stars blink back at you. A lone pair of footsteps treads outside of your pod. Probably one of the other record girls sneaking back from a late night tryst. 

Usually you love the quiet familiarity of your room, but something about the pure darkness makes it seem suffocating. Instead of feeling safe and sheltered, you can’t help but look around and think,  _ am I trapped? _

_ Trapped.  _ The word churns around in your mind, unsettling you. It leaves a bitter taste in the back of your mouth. You have to find a way out, even just for a minute. You pad back over to your bed and slide on your boots, wrapping your arms around yourself as you sneak out into the corridor. 

You don’t know where you’re expecting to go; all orderlies are supposed to be asleep by now. You don’t know what you’ll say if someone happens upon you. _ Blame it on a weak bladder _ , your mind muses,  _ say you were heading to the communal refresher _ . You head in that direction, just in case. 

The ship feels enormous around you. It’s lonely, but you’re used to that. The hum that usually calms you, jolts your nerves, pushing you farther down the corridor, way past the refresher. You let your mind take a break. Let your legs push you forward.

The lights are out in all of the pods, but you hear someone clearing their throat from one of them. Do they feel trapped, too? Are they lonely, too?

There’s a large window at the end of the corridor. It allows you to see way more of the stars than the one in your room, and you head towards it, almost missing the figure in black standing to the side. Their robes fall around them, hands clasped behind their back. If they sense your presence, they’re not making it known. 

Getting closer, you make out a mask. Despite the darkness of the corridor, the figure has their mask clasped on tightly. 

You see it.

You recognize it.

_ Commander Ren. _

The name falls from your lips, and before you can stop it from happening, Commander Ren turns and eyes you. 

You’re terrified. It’s no secret that Commander Ren is second in power; you’ve heard horror stories of all the terrible things he’s done. He puffs his chest, leaving you cowering beneath his gaze. It’s only the second time you’ve seen him in person, and the first time you weren’t alone. Or sneaking around. Or breaking protocol. 

“Commander,” you say. Your voice is thin. “I apologize for sneaking up on you, sir.”

He says nothing at first, leaving you in the silence of his raspy breathing through the vocoder. Is he deciding whether to kill you or not?

“You’re breaking regulation codes.” Commander Ren’s voice is low, and rough, and familiar. Something you’ve heard a thousand times through holopads. His presence is electrifying.

“Again, Commander, I apologize.”

You wrap your arms tighter around yourself, seeming even smaller compared to the broad-shouldered creature in front of you. 

_ I don’t want to die tonight,  _ you think, casting your eyes downward, and forgetting the Commander’s ability to read minds. 

You watch his hands disappear from your line of view, and a hissing sound follows shortly after. His mask returns in his hands, and with hesitant eyes, you look up. 

_ Oh _ .

He’s just a man. Dark haired, with a thousand tiny moles and freckles that decorate his face. 

“You won’t die. Not tonight,” Commander Ren says. His voice is foreign without the vocoder to hide it, but just as low. “However, breaking protocol is worthy of punishment. Why are you out here?”

“I…” Your voice is weak. Your knees are weak. You know better than to lie. He’d just raid your thoughts for the truth. “I felt trapped, Commander. I was headed towards the refresher, but the stars distracted me, sir.”

Commander Ren looks at you oddly, before nodding once. “I see.”

He moves to the side, gesturing for you to join him at the window. On shaky legs, you stand beside him, watching the twinkling stars blink and bounce. Through side-eyed glances, you stare at Commander Ren. He can’t be much older than you are. Late twenties, maybe. Perhaps early thirties. 

“What is your placement?”

“Document processor, sir. DP-611 v. 2.”

“This is not to happen again,” Commander Ren says. “Understood?”

“Understood, sir.”


	2. Chapter 2

**“** Six in the morning, can I hold you?

Are we done talking? Do we have to?  **“**

**For Sure : Carly Rae Jepson**

{x}

You wait to message Brinna about the previous night’s affairs until the morning. Usually, you’d tell her these things in person, but who knows who would overhear you speaking in the cantina. 

**DATAPAD MESSAGING**

**Receiving** : Brinna Horne

**06:18:57 AM**

_ GOOD MORNING BRIN! _

_ HOW’D YOU SLEEP? _

_ GOOD? _

_ GOOD. _

_ YOU’LL NEVER GUESS WHAT HAPPENED _ _   
_ _ LAST NIGHT! _

**Wait.**

**Slow down.**

**It’s too early for this.**

You knew she wasn’t a morning person, but this couldn’t wait. This was legendary. 

_ I ran into someone last night. _

_ He’s… _

_ Unexpectedly human. _

_ & oddly beautiful. _

**What?!!!!!**

**Oh my stars!**

**Who??**

_ Think R. _

**Rego?**

**Redarr?**

**Ronon?**

**Will you tell me if I’m getting close?**

_ Three letters. _

Brinna doesn’t respond right away, giving you time to braid your hair and twist it up so that it won’t be in your face all day.

Your hair was your favorite part of you; it fell in long, soft waves down your back. It just wasn’t practical to have it hanging around when you had to be bending over books everyday. 

The datapad pings. One message. Then two. Then three. Then four.

**Please tell me I’m wrong.**

**Please, please, please.**

**Tell me I’m way off track and I’m stupid for even**

**guessing this.**

**Ren?**

_ Maybe... _

**KRIFF.**

**YOU’RE KRIFFING KIDDING ME.**

**This is a joke, isn’t it?**

**A joke just to wake me up.**

_ No, I swear! _

_ I was only in his presence for a few moments, _

_ but I promise I’m telling the truth. _

**You have to tell me everything!**

**Wait, no, don’t.**

**I won’t be able to hold it in.**

**Just tell me how old he is.**

_ I don’t know, honestly. _

_ Twenty-eight, maybe?  _

_ Twenty-nine? _

_ He’s young. _

**Our youngest Commander yet.**

**No offense, but why didn’t he kill you?**

You don’t know how to respond. You don’t  _ know  _ why he spared your life. Especially after one of his childish temper tantrums. It didn’t necessarily make sense, but you weren’t going to question it. 

You stare out your tiny window, letting the unfamiliarity of the situation sink in. You can hear others shuffling outside of your pod, and you know you have to leave the familiarity of your room soon. 

_ I don’t know. _

_ But I’m grateful. _

**Me too.**

{x}

The records room is unusually quiet, although you can’t say that you mind it. 

A few workers pass you by, nodding their hellos and goodbyes, leaving you in the dim room.

Taking a glance at the cart of documents to your right, you decide not to put off the reshelving. It angers you, this part of the job, because of the little stepping block you have to lug around, aisle to aisle. Attzamm to Nyettu to Soammu, saving the W’s for last. 

A low voice startles you out of your contemplation, causing you to drop the documents you’re holding.

“DP-611 v. 2.”

“Commander Ren!” You hurry to pick up the papers, urging your heart to stop beating so fast. “I wasn’t expecting you.”

“I am aware.”

Standing back up, you bow your head towards him as some sort of reverence. “Can I help you, sir?”

He’s even more intimidating today, with all of his black garb on, towering over you. Making you feel like a child about to be scolded. 

“I’m in need of a map. Marked by Quaffir. Greore Gejalli Quaffir, I believe.”

“Of course, sir. Right this way.”

Forgetting your cart, you weave your way through the aisles of dusty documents until you find the Q’s . You thumb through the articles, wondering why he didn’t send a Knight to do such a menial job.

Behind you, he breathes heavily into his mask.

_ Get a grip, _ you urge yourself. 

In an attempt to curb the silence, you clear your throat and say, “A map, sir. Are you planning a trip?”

“No.”

So much for that. 

“I think you went past it.” Commander Ren’s gloved hands come up beside yours, shuffling through the various papers. He’s almost pressed against your back; the aisle is tight and he’s a giant of a man. Once he finds what he’s looking for, he holds it up for inspection, still formed against you. 

“Is there anything else I can help you with, Commander?”

Setting the map down on a shelf behind him, Commander Ren unclips his mask, placing it with the map. Seeing him is just as much of a shock as it was last night. Up close, you allow yourself to look at his eyes, and see that they’re a honeyed hazel. 

He grabs your face tightly in his hands. You let out what sounds like a choked scream.

_ Maybe he’s changed his mind about killing me. _

The Commander lets out a dark chuckle. “I will not be killing you. Not today.”

“Then what are you doing, sir?” You sound frightened, but your body betrays you and gives into his grip, nuzzling into his touch. 

“Is it busy down here?”

“Not usually, but-”

“We’ll have to see how quiet we can be, won’t we?”

One hand drifts from your face, down past your waist, to slip into your pants. His leather-covered fingers run over your lower stomach until they have a hold of your panties.

“I must ensure that you’re okay with this, DP-611 v. 2.”

You can’t figure out how to form what you’re feeling, so you nod vigorously. That must be answer enough, because he slips a finger between your slit. One finger thrusts into your wet cunt while the other toys with your slit.

You let out a gasp, and it must be too loud for the Commander, because he shoves his free hand into your mouth.

“Suck.”

Obliging, you hollow your cheeks around his fingers, trying not to gag when he pushes too hard. 

He adds another finger, and the noise it makes is obscene. It’s been so long since anyone touched you like this. 

You reach forward, grasping for the erection that’s pressing against your hip, but Commander Ren stops you. 

“Desperate for my cock, whore?”

Removing his fingers from your mouth so you can answer, you choke out, “Yes, Commander.”

He pulls away your uniform, sliding your panties down around your ankles, and undoes his garb. 

Even before it’s free, you can tell how massive his erection is. 

Pushing you against a stray cart, he slides between your legs, teasing you by letting the tip of his cock brush against your wet cunt, before forcing himself inside you. You have no choice but to take it all at once, looking down at the way it’s disappearing into your desperate cunt. 

His pace is rough, one hand coming between your legs to pinch at your clit until you get that familiar tightening in your legs. He must recognize your fight, because he thrusts his hand back into your mouth, muffling the inevitable moans that escape you as you hit your climax. 

Biting his bottom lip hard enough to draw blood, he fucks you through your orgasm, thrusting faster and harsher until he finds his own, emptying completely into your already dripping cunt. 

Commander Ren pulls out quickly, leaving you wincing. He fixes himself, wiping his fingers on his robes, before clasping his mask back in place and grabbing the map. On shaking legs, you jump off the cart, adjusting your own clothing.

He turns to you, once again just a creature in a mask. 

“I expect your utmost professionalism when it comes to this matter.”

“Yes, Commander Ren.”

“I hope I will not have to use the threat of your life anytime soon.”

“I assure you, Commander Ren, this will not leave this aisle.”

“Good.”


	3. Chapter 3

**“** You left your number on my bed

Saying this is all that you gotta do  **”**

**Need You Now : Dean Lewis**

{x}

“I’m sorry, you  _ what _ ?” Brinna exclaims, dragging you to a quiet corner of Kesi’s pod. Using her typical charm, and the promise of Meiloorun Juice, she’d forced you to the gathering. 

“Keep your voice down, please,” you plead with her, twisting your arm from her vice-like grip.

“Please, please,  _ please _ , tell me this is an elaborate joke.”

“I swear it’s not, Brin.”

“You expect me to just…  _ believe… _ that Commander Ren sought you out for an illicit affair?” Brinna gulps down whatever’s left in her cup and sets it on a side table. “What proof do you have?”

“None, but-”

“Exactly! How do I know you’re not lying?”

“Brinna, please. I wouldn’t lie to you.”

She searches your eyes, looking for any signs of distrust, and when she’s satisfied, she slowly shakes her head.

“He’s dangerous.”

“I’m well aware.”

“You know you have to be careful.”

“Of course.”

{x}

Returning back to your little pod is a relief. 

The ability to wallow in silent darkness is something you welcome; taking a moment to recall the events of the day. You undress quickly, pushing the ruined panties to the bottom of your clothes bin. 

Your datapad bings from across the room.

**DATAPAD MESSAGE INCOMING**

**SENDER** : Commander Kylo Ren

**10:01:25 PM**

**DP-611 v. 2.**

That’s all he says.

That’s all he needs to say to send your nerves into a spiral.

_ Present, sir. _

**For future reference, are you aware of where my**

**quarters are located?**

Your mind blanks at his words. The possibility of another encounter makes you sweat, recalling his quick, rough thrusts. 

_ No, sir. _

**I’ll send a Knight with instructions.**

**Tomorrow.**

_ Yes, sir. _

_ Thank you, sir. _

He doesn’t respond after that, but that’s okay.

It’s okay that he doesn’t know your name.

It’s okay that you’ll have to face one of his sacred Knights tomorrow.

You scroll to Brinna’s message sector, intending to fill her in on the latest update. 

You write,  _ I have something to tell you. _

You write,  _ something you’ll never believe. _

You write,  _ my day got even crazier somehow. _

And then you erase all of the messages. Is it wrong to tell her? Is it wrong to keep this from her? You’ve never had a secret before. Your life hasn’t been interesting enough. But this… this goes beyond interesting. 

Logging out of your datapad, you sit on the edge of your bed. This is your chance. This is your time.

{x}

True to his word, Commander Ren sends a knight down to you. Ushar, you think.

You suspect he’s aware of what’s going on, but he doesn’t make any comments, simply leaving you with a slip of paper and a tight head nod.

In what you can only imagine to be Commander Ren’s messy scrawl, you read,

_ Highest level, past the cantina.  _

_ Last pod on the right. _

_ Knock twice. _

You tuck the paper into your waistband, ensuring that no one was around to witness it. 

Then, you carry on with your workload. 

{x}

Days pass. Nothing particularly out of the ordinary happens.

Brinna is sent away in a TIE fighter to fight off a stem of the Resistance. 

General Hux infuriates Commander Ren enough to cause literal sparks to fly. 

You work up your courage to send Commander Ren a message. 

**DATAPAD MESSAGING**

**Receiving** : Commander Kylo Ren

**09:49:12 PM**

_ Commander Ren, I couldn’t help but _

_ overhear your quarrel. _

_ Are you alright, sir? _

**My quarters.**

**Now, DP-611 v. 2.**

You’re a flurry of nerves as you exit your pod and rush to his, throwing your hair up messily along the way. You’re grateful for the cold, empty hallways. There’s no one to question what a woman of your lower status was doing lurking on the higher ground. 

Reaching Commander Ren’s pod, you don’t even get to knock twice before the door flies open and Commander Ren storms over to you, grabbing both of your wrists and dragging you into his quarters. He pushes you against the wall, and you gasp, the intensity shocking you. He’s unmasked, and ungloved this time. 

“Consider this your punishment for previously breaking regulation codes,” is all he says before pulling you towards his bedroom, flinging you onto the bed like a ragdoll. 

“I-” you try to squeak out anything, but he covers your mouth with his hand.

“No talking,” he commands.

You want to protest, but his other hand finds your wet core and you moan into his palm.

“That’s it, slut. Moan for me.”

Bringing you right to the edge of coming, he stops thrusting his fingers in and out of your dripping cunt. You let out a choked cry, a few tears slipping down your cheeks. If he notices, he doesn’t care. 

Removing the hand from your slit, but keeping the other covering your mouth, he hurries to rid himself of his pants, taking yours off too.

Without any preparation, he thrusts himself all the way in, and you let out a strangled scream around his hand. 

“You like your Commander’s cock, whore?” He emphasizes his words by pulling out and slamming back into you, hitting your cervix in the process. 

As if to urge him on, you arch your back, feeling your hips lift off of his mattress. He continues pumping in and out of you, harder with every thrust. He mouths at your collarbone, biting hard. You can expect a bruise there by morning. 

Taking his hand away from your mouth, he reaches between your bodies to slip a hand up your shirt, twisting your nipples hard. 

“You are not to break any regulation codes without my permission, understood?”

You nod your head once, unable to pronounce words. Commander Ren smiles cockily, satisfied, and moves your legs so they drape over his shoulders, making the angle he’s thrusting into you even more intense.

“Sir, please,” you moan. “I’m going to come.”

He ignores your pleading, continuing to pound into you. The grip he’s got on your hip is so tight, but it anchors you to the bed. His other hand finds itself on your throat, the pressure making your moans and cries come out wheezy. 

“You’re allowed to come on three, slut. One, two, three,” he instructs, and you spasm on his thick cock, noticing when he finds his release. Pulsing ropes of come decorate the inside of your cunt. 

Commander Ren pulls out of you just as quickly as the last time, letting your legs fall. You feel numb. 

Placing your pants and undergarments on top of your stomach, he leaves his bedroom, calling over his shoulder, “I expect you know how to find your way out.”


End file.
